When You're No Longer Wanted by Becky Dietz

What happens when a church no longer wants you?  It's happening more and more in the U.S.A.  Churches are firing pastors...even pastors who established that church, grew it, and have been there for years.  It used to be that if a pastor stayed in one place for a number of years, it was a badge of commendation not just for that pastor, but for the church.  In fact, they both had to be careful that idolatry didn't become an issue--people worshiping their pastor.

That's very seldom the case today.  Churches become bored or disenchanted with their pastors at a pretty fast pace...or they begin resisting them--especially if they're trying to lead them in a new direction.

You have a choice.  You can stay and try to combat the issues with truth or you can choose to leave.  Neither choice is wrong.  There may be a stronghold in the church which needs to be torn down and your husband may be just the man to do it.  Just know going in that it will probably divide because truth is a sword.  There will be leadership which will resist it, people in the church who will resist it, and friends who will resist it...which is the hardest of all.  And you may find out just how few people want truth.  That's the sad state of the Church today.  On the flipside, it may surprise you to find out who is on the side of truth!

Or you can choose to leave.  That's also a legitimate choice.  You may have already fought a battle for truth for months or years and see no change.  You know in your heart that things are not going to change and for you to stay will only create more division.  And because you love the church and the people, you choose to leave.  Honestly, it may be that God has taken you in a different direction than the church and you're the one who's changed...and your belief system no longer matches that of the church.  In that case, it's definitely time to go.

Any of these scenarios is hard.  It's hard not to feel abandoned or unloved--dispensable.  But here's what you need to know.  GOD has closed the door--even if it's by the fact that He's allowed it.  And it's not to harm you.  If He has closed the door, He has a plan...a good plan!  He has not abandoned you, He loves you...YOU are His treasure.  But so is the church you're leaving.  The best and most gracious thing you can do is to keep loving that church, *don't speak badly of it, and honor the leadership and their decision.  Just know that God has allowed it for a reason and keep your focus on Him, trust Him and follow Him.  He will open a door.  *I recognize there may be extreme situations which call for discipline, rebuke and stern warning for the church.  And I'm certainly not an advocate of sweeping things under the carpet.  This is assuming you've done everything you could to bring healing to the situation scripturally.

Andy & I were 9 months without a job.  And I reminded him during that time that God would open a door for ministry.  Our hearts were yielded to Him and we had our hands in the air and were yelling, "Pick us!  Pick us!!!!"  If He's told us to pray for workers for the harvest, how will He not use us if our hearts are open to any correction and we're eager to help?  We recognized the next phase of our ministry might not be in a church and we were OK with that, too.

Spend your waiting time listening and allowing the Spirit of God to correct you, transform your mind, and give you direction.  Forgive any offenses--wipe that slate clean!  And be willing to do whatever it takes to provide for your family in the meantime.  Trust Him to open a new door and yield your heart to His desires and follow your passions!

He's gonna take care of you....I promise.

The Artisan Soul by Erwin McManus

I know so many pastor's wives who are struggling with their purpose, feeling unfulfilled, or afraid to step into what God is asking them to do.  God's been teaching me so much lately and I can't wait to share some of those things with you.  But in the meantime, my son sent me this video and I thought it was dynamite!  I hope you'll watch all 35 minutes of it...because it may just free you!

What Were YOU Created For? by Becky Dietz

I had very low, limited expectations as a young mom about God's purpose for my life.  I loved learning about Him and exploring new ideas, but because of some false teaching I'd taken in, I never pursued uncovering the gifts and desires of my heart.  I had lots of unfruitful thinking.  I was just a wife, mother, and staff wife--in my own mind.  My husband was the gifted one and got the pats on the back.  I just didn't see I had any gifts or if I did, that they were beneficial to the kingdom of God.

It wasn't until my last two kids were in high school that I ventured into the work force....and that was only as a church librarian.  But that was big wing-spreading for me!  I loved it...mainly because I loved books and was getting to choose lots of new books for the library every month.  After 5 years of being church librarian, I pursued becoming the director of a benevolence ministry our church had begun.  I got the position and God began doing an incredible thing...something I didn't even see until I looked back.  God began uncovering my gifts Himself.  I was discovering myself and my passions.  While I was librarian, I also realized I liked photography.  When our local K-Mart was going out of business, I found a Canon camera without a lens and bought it for $35.  My friend bought the lens for my birthday and we began taking photos at weddings.  We weren't the best photographers, but we were helping people who couldn't afford a "real photographer."  It was also in this same time frame that my daughter invited me to come speak at women's retreats she had for the young women in her church.  I. loved. it.  Who knew??

Through these experiences and in a relatively short period of time, God began showing me the purposes for which He'd created me.  I am passionate about teaching new truths to women.  Give me a pulpit, a stage, or a platform and I am in my element.  Public speaking is the #1 fear for most people...but I eat it up!  I love books.  I love to read and I love discussing books I've read.  I love learning...especially if I'm learning with someone who is just as passionate as me and we begin bouncing ideas or new revelation off of one another.  It's invigorating to me.  I am gifted when it comes to leading an organization and directing it.  I can see what needs to be done and know how to lead people and encourage them.  I used to feel guilty for spending so much time planning and organizing until I realized how necessary it was to be a good leader.  I enjoy photography.  I honestly don't use my 35 mm as much as I used to because my phone camera is so available.  But I've gotten some phenomenal photos with my phone and have successfully turned them into 16x20 photographs.  I love God's creation and brag on Him with my photos.  (He loves that--and gives me beautiful sunsets because of it!)

It's taken me a long time to realize who I am and God's purpose in creating me.  I hope you're already figuring that out.  I believe I'll be figuring out God's purposes for me the rest of my life.  He loves to unveil these things a little at a time.  I believe it's one of His delights--just like I can see many of my children's gifts and how God will use them before they figure it out.  It's taken me a long time...but I love being me.  I'm a unique expression of God...and so are you.  I hope you are awakened to some new-to-you passions God planted in you before you were born.  You're not just a pastor's wife.

The Winners!

THE WINNERS!

Christi Watson

Mary Jo Smith

I just thought it would be fun for you to see the winners of the Mother's Day drawing.  These young pastor's wives have each won a decorative cross and a Mardel gift card (already in the mail!).  But I thought it would be even more meaningful for you to see the donor of these gifts and hear a little about her....

Staci & her husband, Daniel

Staci donated the crosses and the Mardel cards.  Staci loves to give.  Her sister-in-law posted a picture this week of huge baskets of goodies she fixed for our 2 Groom high school guys going to State in track and for  their coach.  She has a very generous heart.  She also has three children--two girls and a boy.

Daniel and Staci have only been believers for less than a year.  They had family in our church who were talking to them about Jesus and they had lots of questions because of their background.  So they asked to meet with Andy, my husband.  With tears, they both made Jesus Lord of their lives.

Their story is so much more amazing than all of this.  But I have to tell you...Staci was the first to jump in with both hands waving telling me she wanted to donate gifts to some pastor's wives to encourage them.  My heart was greatly moved.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

It's MOTHER'S DAY!!  And because it is, we are giving away two gifts.  Each includes a cross and a gift card from Mardel Bookstore.  These beautiful gifts come from a young mom, Staci,  in my church who immediately responded and wanted to bless a pastor's wife.  You would LOVE this girl!  So...to win a cross and gift card, you have to tell me how many children...or spiritual children...you have!  

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all of you!